I found this topic in one of the groups here and it gave me the desire to write a separate blog about it and what my thoughts on the matter are.
I’d like to answer the question straight off by asking another question. Can a child learn how to talk if no one ever talks around the child?
The answer to that particular question has been answered several times in the cases of feral children. Feral children also teach us that humans learn by example. So, how can a Master expect a slave to learn anything correctly if the Master doesn’t do those things himself?
The example I’ll use is smoking. A discussion in this same group showed me that, in the people who answered, the majority of the Masters or Dominants who wouldn’t allow their slaves to smoke smoked themselves. I’m not going to turn this into a debate of smoking is okay or not okay but rather I want to go with the following statement.
Doing something yourself that you’re against another doing is very hypocritical.
Moving on with my thoughts… I don’t think I’d be able to respect a Master as a person if one were to come to me and say something along the lines of “you can’t do this but I can because I said so” and if I can’t respect someone as a person wouldn’t be able to respect that person as a Master either.
In a lot of sense I find D/s relationships to have a lot of ‘parent/child’ type of learning to them. Rules… punishment… being shaped into what the other thinks you should be… learning the things he wants you to learn… that sort of thing. Well anyways, just my thoughts on it…
I definitely think a Master should lead by example. It isn’t always possible and can be very hard… but I think that would make for a better relationship. :)
Very interesting question. My initial reaction was "right on", but after thinking about it I'm going to play devil's advocate. So my Goddess says, "I can have as many orgasms as I want, and you will have none, unless I give you permission."
ReplyDeletePretty much fits the "i can do this and you can't" statement. There are lots of other examples and most of them revolve around the "power exchange" and the required "sacrifices" a sub often has to make.
Now I'm conflicted...lol...not sure what I think, but I like your post and look forward to following :-)